Finding Yourself? Be Gentle.

Over the past year, I have dedicated time to digging deeper into my own life. Getting clear on my core desires; what I want more of and what I want less of.

I thought this would be a freeing, uplifting experience. Ha. Ha. Ha. Let me just say this, I have pushed and tested myself more than I ever have, which brought on massive discomfort. I have also disappointed people.

What I have found… is that discomfort and disappointment are all part of the process. And, please hear this: You will disappoint other people, and other people will disappoint you. It is when you are no longer willing to disappoint yourself when you will find and accept the most authentic version of yourself.

So, what is the process?? This is the beauty. There isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach to understanding and honoring who you truly are. What I do know to be true is that I have identified 3 strategies that will help you on your way to self discovery.

Here they are:

1. Create massive space for yourself. This means you have to create space for your thoughts, feelings, and even actions. In this space, the practice of awareness and non-judgment will allow you to keep going deeper. 

2. Create massive space for others. During this time where you have the potential to be quite vulnerable, practicing compassion toward others will allow you to extend the safe circle you are creating for yourself.

3. Lean into the spaces where your energy takes you. If you lean into what your intuitive side knows to be true, you will be able to surround yourself with the tools that will have your back. This could be reading thought-provoking books, working with a therapist, working with a coach. You don’t have to do this alone.

I am continuing to honor the space I have created for myself, the space I have created for others, and also asking for more help from those who are massively supporting my journey. I am telling you this because the discomfort that has come up has allowed me to have more growth than I ever thought possible.

I have started to accept and honor my needs, which has created tension in some relationships. And, now I have massive clarity, compassion, and forgiveness within them. I have a clearer vision on how I will structure my time based on my core desires and my WHY.

I have chosen to put myself out there and be the most vulnerable version of myself.

I have chosen to sit with the urge to fix things. 

I have chosen to sit with the urge to take on old codependent behaviors.

I have chosen to say YES to things that really scare me but I know are right.

And why?

I believe that we are all created so uniquely amazing, AND, it is our birthright to know who we are authentically - and then to show up for ourselves authentically. Our intuitive sense will guide us, and our intuitive sense can be the clearest when we release fear, blame, shame, and grief.

We can release the emotions that need releasing when we are willing to feel them. And, when we do, we open up a whole new world of self-discovery. So, be gentle. Create space for you and them. Lean in. Ask yourself what it is that you need… and do that.

Trust the process. If it feels like you want to puke, you are doing it right.

All my love.

Xoxo-
Ali